Before I go

Planning your own funeral ceremony 

a gift for your family

Many families I meet when planning the funeral ceremony of a loved one find the process therapeutic, a moment to pause and reminisce over happy days and what that special person meant to them.

It can also feel a little overwhelming not knowing what to include in the funeral, second guessing "what they would have liked". I often hear "I wish we'd have spoken about this a bit more" but in truth those conversations are hard and we naturally turn our heads away from thinking about.... when the time comes.

The fogginess of early grief can prevent us from remembering all those life stories we've been told over the years. Where was it mum and dad met? What did grandad win that cup for?

We may tell our folks what songs we'd like at our own funeral, and maybe there's a poem that means something special, but do we ever map out our life story to gift onwards after we've gone? This is where Toby the Celebrant can help.

Your funeral ceremony can be planned before you go, including  you in those discussions not only helps to make your ceremony special but a physical gift, a log of your life is much more meaningful than just your name on a family tree.

I will meet you, either on your own or with a family member of your choice, and with tea and cake we'll lift the lid on your story, from your early childhood days, teenage dreams, your career, family life, memories and achievements. What made you laugh, what brought challenges and how you pulled though. What those around you have meant to you. Maybe remember the elders in your own life, what they passed down to you and you passed to your youngsters.

We can think about the music that mapped your life, how your own story fitted with news and social culture over the decades. perhaps you have a final message or life lesson to share at your funeral too. I will capture all this in a special document which can be left for your family, details to help with the planning of your funeral ceremony, a keepsake to pass down through the generations.

I will charge a modest fee for this service, and should your family chose me to be the celebrant delivering your funeral ceremony this fee will be taken off my standard charge for your funeral.

I'd like to think you'd appreciate knowing the person delivering your ceremony, and not a stranger in a suit, and how lovely for me to say on the day that I'd met you too.

Feel free to contact me if you'd like to know more, either for yourself or a family member.